Jun 9, 2003

i think ive realized something this morning on my way to work. i know why i always set myself up to fail. why things always seemed doomed before they start.

it comes down to my parents. everytime i do something good or something good happens to me that im excited about, something thats a big deal to me, and i tell my parents, they make it seem like nothing. i have a great idea for something i wanna do, it never seems to be supported im told a better way to do something instead of letting me find out for myself. i understand that sometimes ive had dumb plans or something, but a little support would be nice. its not what they say, its not like they say thats stupid, or i dont think you should do that, its the fact that they dont say, thats great. they just seem so unenthused, like they dont really care what i do. and then i end up losing excitement for it, i dont care if it works.

i think thats why anytime something good comes about, it automatically gets set up for failure cause i think my parents have unintentionally made me feel like, i am nothing but a failure.

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